I
am a collossal hypochondriac and a germophobe. For this reason, the
universe always sits the coughing wheezing snifflers in front of or next
to me on trains and buses (and airplanes). Today I found myself in
front of a violent throat clearer. Everytime he did it, I shook in my
seat. But that wasn't it. As he read his free paper, he picked his nose.
Not just lightly or fleetingly. He was digging deep. He was fracking
for shale gas deep. Having satisfied himself, he rolled his quarry
between thumb and index and wiped it on the seat. Now I don't want to
sit in a train or read a free paper or even leave the house ever again.
Erstmal zu Penny
The supermarket Penny is the budget supermarket for those on a tight budget. Their slogan is 'Erstmal zu Penny' which means it's the first port of call for the sensible German shopper. In my experience, it's also the the first port of call for the clinically insane German shopper. Hopefully, there isn't something in the food there. I was in line at the counter with a carton of milk, a bag of apples and toilet paper (irrelevant but true). I had placed my basket in the stack by the gum rack before emptying the conten ts onto the conveyor belt. Before I had grabbed the milk out of the basket, the tiny Indian woman behind me put her basket on top of mine. I didn't need to say anything. She saw that her basket didn't fit snugly in the one underneath. She lifted it up and I grabbed my milk quickly out of the way. She smiled sheepishly and apologised. No problem, I insisted. This brief moment, it seems, broke the ice between us. Unfortunately, waiting
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